Deciding to become pregnant is a huge decision, impacting upon your situation in life, your relationship with the father, your support systems, finances, career path and the right time to be pregnant.
There is a choice and a balance available today between planning the right moment and the spontaneity of becoming pregnant
Similar to any life decision, a pregnancy should ideally be planned or anticipated, and the circumstances should allow you to be a successful parent. However, life is not always ideal, and things happen unexpectedly
If you become pregnant by mistake, the decision to continue the pregnancy or have an abortion can be very difficult. There is no easy, correct answer, and no one but you can make that choice.
We recommend that if you are unsure, that you find a non-judgmental friend or confidant that you can talk to, not to ask for an answer, but to listen to you.
If that support or "listenerâ€ is not available, you may find it helpful talking to an experienced counselor or therapist. We can arrange that for you.
You need to see what is good for you at this time and for the future, not hear what is right for anyone else.
This is your decision to make because no one walks in your shoes. Only you can know the impact of being pregnant, having a baby, or ending an early pregnancy can have on your life. And only you will have to live with your decision. It is easy for someone else to give you an opinion, but they won't have to live with the consequences.
There may never be a 100% correct answer; either way. There may always be some regret and doubt.
However, having an abortion does not always mean that you will feel sad or have regret. Many women feel relieved and look forward to a positive, happy future. The wonders of modern medicine allows us to make choices and plan a future pregnancy given the right time and circumstances. Similar to men, women have life goals and aspirations, without shame or guilt.
What are the options?
The options available to you include:
- Keeping the baby,
- Continuing the pregnancy and putting the baby up for adoption,
- Ending the pregnancy soon, preferably within the first three months of pregnancy.
We are honest in our support for any decision you make, and will get you help in choosing an Obstetrician or Family Doctor to help you through the pregnancy, to help you put the baby up for adoption or have an abortion.
About Meridia Medical Group:
We are in integrated medical group, with a focus on Women's Health, including Gynecology, Mental Health (Psychiatry, Social work, Sexual Medicine and Psychology), Primary Care and Dermatology (General skin conditions and Cosmetic care).
The Meridia Gynecology Division is a Gynecology centre first and foremost.
We focus on many procedures and treatments including
- Colposcopy (abnormal pap test or vulva lesions)
- Hysteroscopy (looking inside the uterus)
- D&C's for miscarriages
- Fertility Care: we help women become pregnant
- Treatment for bleeding problems and many related surgical procedures.
We are not an abortion only clinic but support and treat women needing an abortion. By being an integrated, female focused centre; we see the bigger picture and we are not committed to one option only.
What you should know if you decide to have an abortion:
We recommend that if you decide to have an abortion, that you get support to help you through the process. This may be talking to a trusted friend, your partner, a sibling, a therapist or a social worker.
In Canada, abortion is legal and a woman's choice. Despite your right to make your own decision, it is still a stigma and controversial. 85-90% of Canadians support your right to choose. That still does not make it easy.
That is why we offer you unconditional, nonjudgmental support.
Getting pregnant can happen to anyone by mistake, not just to you. About one in four women have had an abortion, but rarely talk about it. You are not alone if you choose to have an abortion.
Becoming pregnant by mistake can happen despite our best intentions.
- Condoms do break,
- Birth control pills fail (3-5%);
- and just like many normal, healthy, intelligent women, we sometimes have sex without protection. It happens to many of us -Yes we are human!
- If you have experienced sexual assault, this is a very trying time. We will absolutely support you and direct you to the correct care professionals that you require. Never feel ashamed about asking for help and direction. This is not your fault.
The Sadness and Relief:
Choosing to have an abortion can sometimes be difficult, and you should still be able to move forward with your life with a clear conscience, despite some potential regret and sadness. We will help you find clarity of thought so that you do not lose self confidence or self esteem. Sometimes difficult decisions need to be made in life. We will help you get through this.
As mentioned earlier, deciding to have an abortion is not always a negative decision and many women feel relieved and confident to move forward and plan their lives accordingly.
Once you have decided:
If you have decided to have an abortion:
- We promise you a supportive, private, discreet process, where you are cared for.
- We listen, explain and offer the best care.
- We understand you may have emotional pain and appreciate your dilemma.
- We respect your decision and your courage, knowing that this can be a difficult process for you.
Our center is state of the art and caring. We never want you to suffer or stand alone.
- We will see you ASAP.
- We try to have you seen within 24-48 hours.
- We do not want to prolong your anxiety and fear.
- If you decide to proceed, the procedure will be done within 1-2 days, sometimes on the same day. This is similar to women who are having a miscarriage.
- We never make you wait unnecessarily.
We try to see you at least once before the procedure, to talk to you, to examine you gently (see"Your Gynecology exam").
An ultrasound is done to help plan the safest procedure.
We support you with counseling; which is vital to help you make your initial decision, and then support you through-out, especially after the procedure, to prevent the possibility of you becoming confused or depressed.
There is a small but clear increased chance of developing Depression after an abortion, if adequate support and counseling does not occur. This is understandable given the situation and the maternal, hormonal and social affects.
We want you to feel clear and confident about your decision, similar to any decision you make about other medical care.
If you need more time, we will see you as often as you like until you know what you want. There is no pressure. We go through all the options available.
If you choose to have an abortion, we always recommend a D&C because it is safe, quick and done immediately.
A D&C is the most common small procedure done in the world. Millions are done every year. (There are about 46 million terminations done every year in the world, according to the WHO)
A D&C means "Dilatation and Curettage", which is the simple process to simply of removing the pregnancy tissue from you uterus (womb).
- At Meridia Gynecology, we are very concerned that you experience no pain at all during the procedure.
- We will never give you insufficient medication.
- There is no reason in the world why you should feel pain during a D&C.
- Clinics that do abortions where women experience pain should be closed down.
- Please choose your centre carefully and avoid conveyer belt clinics. Your respect and privacy should always come first, just like any other medical procedure. Just because you are having an abortion does not mean that you should be treated with less care and respect!
We use conscious sedation during every procedure. This means that you will receive a sedative and pain medication intravenously and will be awake without feeling any pain. This is the safest way of doing a D&C, safer than with general anaesthesia, which should only be used in very special situations today.
- We recommend that you should never have a D&C without adequate anesthesia.
- You do not need a general anesthesia (see above comment).
- Using conscious sedation is the safest way of having an abortion.
- Clinics that only use local anesthesia are being expedient at your expense. Say NO thank you and find another center, even if they say that the pain lasts for a short time. You should have NO pain!
This is a very vulnerable time for you, but please feel confident to ask questions about your care and the procedure.
- You should never have any procedure done without being fully informed about it, understanding other options and the possible side effects and risks. Never feel shy or intimidated to ask questions before a procedure or treatment is done!
Often women in your position will say yes to anything just to get it done. It is difficult complaining about abortion care, because you may not want anyone to know about your situation.
At Meridia Gynecology, we are your advocates, and will never allow you to get poor care. You have a voice at Meridia, and we want to hear it. If you are not happy with any part of your care, we hope that you will feel safe and confident to tell us. Your care, comments and complaints are always kept 100% confidential.
We also want to know how to make things better for other women.